Microdosing Psilocybin Taught Me How to Love Myself

Microdosing isn’t magic. It just gives you a little more awareness. Accepting whatever arises is how you love yourself.

Matt Gangloff
5 min readNov 14, 2022
Photo by Shane on Unsplash

I was sitting on the couch in the lobby of my meditation center, watching people walk by, to practice loving them. Yes, I was high.

A mom walked by, carrying a baby on one side and guiding a toddler on the other. And I thought, “She’s such a good mom. So patient. She really loves those kids.” One after another, people passed by and I found reasons to love them. I found it was easy.

But then, a really fat guy walked by. Then, a drunk, homeless guy. A woman with french tipped nails, caked in makeup, clutching an expensive purse. My chest tightened and my face hardened. These people weren’t so easy to love. I tried. But I couldn’t.

Why can’t I love them, I wondered. That’s when it hit me…

Because they reminded me of parts of myself that I can’t accept.

What Is Microdosing?

At the time this story takes place, I was a few weeks into an experiment with microdosing psilocybin.

Microdosing is taking a fraction of a regular dose, not enough to produce the hallucinogenic effect…

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Matt Gangloff

I teach the how-to’s of Post-Traumatic Growth: How to heal and grow, find a new mission, become your best self and build a meaningful life. www.mattgangloff.com