Hi, D.

Thanks for your thoughtful response.

I respectfully disagree. I think we do have the power to change our situations. I can refer you to a number of pieces I've written that will better articulate my position as to why I think that.

I think the position that we do not have agency over our lives is becoming the dominant argument on the topic and I think it's killing people, which is why I wrote the piece.

However, I have absolutely no doubt your heart is in the right place and I understand how you arrived at the position you hold.

I'm also willing to admit that it's might not be possible, for all people, at all times, in all situations.

But I refuse to budge from this point: We are better off believing we have the power to change than believing we don't, even if it is not true.

If we believe we do not have the power to change when we do, we give ourselves (and I would argue, our disease) license not to try anything.

And that's precisely what trauma wants. That's how victimhood it kills you: it convinces you there is nothing you can do so you might as well lay down and die.

If we believe we can change and we try we might just be right. And we might be able to save ourselves. But even if we're wrong, we end up right back where we started.

Regardless, thanks for adding the conversation and making me think.

Best, Matt